Sex and Sexuality After Vaginal Birth

To prevent infection in the uterus, do not have sexual intercourse until all vaginal discharge has stopped, your stitches have completely healed, and your doctor says it’s OK. Since healing takes about 4 to 6 weeks, many doctors recommend no intercourse until after your postpartum check-up. However, try to maintain emotional and sexual intimacy with your partner until you can resume your normal sexual routine. Love-making without intercourse may be a choice during this time.

It is normal right after having a baby not to feel like having sex for a while. You may be concerned that sex will cause you pain. If so, test your perineum by pressing on it with your finger or put a finger into your vagina to see if it hurts. During sex use a position, such as being on top, that allows you to control penetration. It is important to find a way that doesn’t hurt. Pain causes the muscles to tighten in anticipation of more pain. Vaginal dryness is a common side effect of breast-feeding. If you have discomfort due to vaginal dryness, use a contraceptive cream, or special lubricants, and longer periods of foreplay. Discomfort from intercourse should lessen by the 3rd postpartum month. For a few mothers, it can last for as long as a year.

Your partner may be interested in sex and you may not. Differences in feelings about sex can cause tension and problems between the two of you. Therefore, it is important to talk openly with each other about how both of you are feeling. If you are not interested in sex because you feel too tired, rest before you have sex. You may not be interested because you don’t feel “sexy” anymore. You may be surprised to find that your partner thinks you are sexier and more beautiful now than ever before.

If you are breast-feeding, your desire for sex will probably return to normal after your baby is weaned. Sexual arousal may cause your breasts to leak milk. If leaking milk bothers you or your partner, try feeding your baby before sex or wearing a bra and nursing pads during sex.

Keep in mind that your body and your feelings about sex do return to normal!

More about Self Care After Vaginal Birth

Introduction to Self-care After Vaginal Birth
Preventive Self Care
Perineal Care
Physical Changes and Healing
Breast Care
Activities and Healthy Exercise
Nutrition and Diet
Sexual Relations and Sexuality
Family Planning and Birth Control
Normal “Baby Blues” or Postpartum Depression
Your Postpartum Check-Up
Get as Much Rest as You Can
When to Call Your Doctor